Emily Morse’s Sex Tips for Men

Last week, sexologist Emily Morse revealed her tips on how anyone can become a sexual superhero. But when you’re dealing with sex, there are some tips that just don’t apply to both sexes. Up this week? Emily Morse’s Sex Tips for Men. Note: These are discussed in heterosexual terms, but can be applied to anybody.

1. Know that every women is different.

“A lot of men assume that if they’ve been with one woman, every single woman is the same,” Emily says. “That we’re like cookie cutter. But we’re like snowflakes.”

In other words? Just because your last partner liked something in bed doesn’t mean that your next partner will. Women vary wildly in their sexual preferences, which is why communicating about your needs is so important. But that’s hard for a lot of people – so the best you can do is pay attention. What are her reactions to your different moves? Learn how she responds and act accordingly to what she likes, not what you think she should like.

2. There is no magic bullet.

Want a girl to like you or to have an orgasm? According to Emily, many men in their 20s and 30s are eager to figure out the exact steps to get the outcome they want. But while your intentions might be good, the effect isn’t always.

“Sometimes it can be manipulative because they think, ‘I’m going to say this,’ or ‘I’m going to play games,” Emily says.

So if you think there’s an exact sequence of moves you should follow, think again! Be honest, open and pay attention to your partner. You might be surprised at what you find.

3. Slow down!

If you’re a man, chances are you’re moving too fast.

“A lot of guys have been waiting for this moment,” Emily says. “They’re really excited for sex to happen. But what they don’t realize is that women need time to warm up. Women are slow cookers and men are frying pans. So I always tell guys to go 5 times slower than you think you should.”

She’s also a big proponent of the ‘1 step forward, 2 steps back’ technique.

“Escalate things sexually – let’s say you start making out and kissing her,” Emily explains. “And then maybe back off a little and go back to the kissing and the teasing. Foreplay is not a suggestion, it’s a requirement for women. We actually need it to be built up – so using dirty talk or slowly removing her clothes or touching over our clothes for a while. This is also going to excite her and give you more confidence to know that she’s really ready, rather than you escalating it and ripping her clothes off when she’s not even turned on.”

4. Skip the porn.

Pornography serves a lot of great purposes, according to Emily. But many young men use porn to learn how to please a woman, which Emily deems damaging.

“[Men] believe that what they see in porn is exactly how they should go about pleasing a woman,” Emily says. “When really, most porn is shot by men, directed by men, written by men, for men. And so it’s a visual medium and it’s made to turn men on.”

So that amazing orgasm that porn star had? It probably didn’t feel good to her at all.

So watch pornography for your own pleasure, but don’t use it to brush up on your sex skills. There are several other resources for that.

5. Understand yourself sexually.

It’s crucial for everyone to understand what pleases them sexually, which is where porn can come in handy. Luckily, men tend to find it pretty easy to orgasm. But that’s not all you need to know to understand yourself sexually.

Pay attention to your body. Suffering from pre-ejaculation or not staying erect long enough? Don’t ignore the issue because you’re embarrassed, urges Emily. Take advantage of all the information and talk to your doctor.

Of course, it’s not enough to just understand yourself sexually – you have to let your partner know what you want too! Sure, we’ve said communication is the lubrication before – but it’s a point that bears repeating.

“I think that a lot of men have certain fantasies or things that they’d like,” Emily says. “They might want to try being more dominant or they might want more oral sex from their partner. And so they just have to start really asking about these things and say, ‘God, it would feel so great. I’d love to feel your mouth around me. That would be amazing.'”

“Always be encouraging,” she added.

Want more from Emily? Find her here, then let us know what you thought in the comments, on Facebook or Tweet us @SuperheroYou. Don’t forget to check back next week for sex tips for women!

Written by Sasha Graffagna 

Image Courtesy of Emily Morse

Last week, sexologist Emily Morse revealed her tips on how anyone can become a sexual superhero. But when you’re dealing with sex, there are some tips that just don’t apply to both sexes. Up this week? Emily Morse’s Sex Tips for Men. Note: These are discussed in heterosexual terms, but can be applied to anybody.

1. Know that every women is different.

“A lot of men assume that if they’ve been with one woman, every single woman is the same,” Emily says. “That we’re like cookie cutter. But we’re like snowflakes.”

In other words? Just because your last partner liked something in bed doesn’t mean that your next partner will. Women vary wildly in their sexual preferences, which is why communicating about your needs is so important. But that’s hard for a lot of people – so the best you can do is pay attention. What are her reactions to your different moves? Learn how she responds and act accordingly to what she likes, not what you think she should like.

2. There is no magic bullet.

Want a girl to like you or to have an orgasm? According to Emily, many men in their 20s and 30s are eager to figure out the exact steps to get the outcome they want. But while your intentions might be good, the effect isn’t always.

“Sometimes it can be manipulative because they think, ‘I’m going to say this,’ or ‘I’m going to play games,” Emily says.

So if you think there’s an exact sequence of moves you should follow, think again! Be honest, open and pay attention to your partner. You might be surprised at what you find.

3. Slow down!

If you’re a man, chances are you’re moving too fast.

“A lot of guys have been waiting for this moment,” Emily says. “They’re really excited for sex to happen. But what they don’t realize is that women need time to warm up. Women are slow cookers and men are frying pans. So I always tell guys to go 5 times slower than you think you should.”

She’s also a big proponent of the ‘1 step forward, 2 steps back’ technique.

“Escalate things sexually – let’s say you start making out and kissing her,” Emily explains. “And then maybe back off a little and go back to the kissing and the teasing. Foreplay is not a suggestion, it’s a requirement for women. We actually need it to be built up – so using dirty talk or slowly removing her clothes or touching over our clothes for a while. This is also going to excite her and give you more confidence to know that she’s really ready, rather than you escalating it and ripping her clothes off when she’s not even turned on.”

4. Skip the porn.

Pornography serves a lot of great purposes, according to Emily. But many young men use porn to learn how to please a woman, which Emily deems damaging.

“[Men] believe that what they see in porn is exactly how they should go about pleasing a woman,” Emily says. “When really, most porn is shot by men, directed by men, written by men, for men. And so it’s a visual medium and it’s made to turn men on.”

So that amazing orgasm that porn star had? It probably didn’t feel good to her at all.

So watch pornography for your own pleasure, but don’t use it to brush up on your sex skills. There are several other resources for that.

5. Understand yourself sexually.

It’s crucial for everyone to understand what pleases them sexually, which is where porn can come in handy. Luckily, men tend to find it pretty easy to orgasm. But that’s not all you need to know to understand yourself sexually.

Pay attention to your body. Suffering from pre-ejaculation or not staying erect long enough? Don’t ignore the issue because you’re embarrassed, urges Emily. Take advantage of all the information and talk to your doctor.

Of course, it’s not enough to just understand yourself sexually – you have to let your partner know what you want too! Sure, we’ve said communication is the lubrication before – but it’s a point that bears repeating.

“I think that a lot of men have certain fantasies or things that they’d like,” Emily says. “They might want to try being more dominant or they might want more oral sex from their partner. And so they just have to start really asking about these things and say, ‘God, it would feel so great. I’d love to feel your mouth around me. That would be amazing.'”

“Always be encouraging,” she added.

Want more from Emily? Find her here, then let us know what you thought in the comments, on Facebook or Tweet us @SuperheroYou. Don’t forget to check back next week for sex tips for women!

Written by Sasha Graffagna 

Image Courtesy of Emily Morse

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